A lot of negative occasions in life are triggered by substance abuse. It’s not only loss of physical and behavioral health, job, and financial stability — almost all people in recovery face relationship issues with their family and friends. At times, it’s hard to rebuild trust that was broken by lies, stealing, domestic violence, etc. But doing this is an important part of your recovery — turning back to everyday life and handling addiction triggers. You may ask yourself difficult questions after finishing the rehabilitation center. How to gain your parents trust back? Will my boyfriend still love me after rehab? Below is a step-by-step plan to regain your loved ones’ trust after completing the treatment program.
Steps for Rebuilding Trust After Addiction
Unfortunately, stopping using doesn’t always mean that the source of addiction has been eliminated. After finishing rehab, you have to go a long way to rebuild your world and overcome long-term sobriety. Improving your relationships in recovery is one of the most important steps in your aftercare plan. To achieve this, firstly, stay sober. Even if relapse has happened, get back to sobriety as fast as possible. Only in that case will your close people believe you are about to change. But it would be only the first step.
Honesty and Transparency
In case you don’t know how to fix a broken relationship after rehub, start with the right communication development. It will let people talk out loud about their problems and needs. Stay open and honest during your talks, but don’t switch personalities; focus on situations and their consequences. Non-defensive communication will help you achieve that. Don’t try to justify yourself to any price or act like a victim, but focus on your interlocutor. Instead of saying, “You’ve always been criticizing me!” try, “I see that you don’t believe too much that this time I can stay sober for a long time.”
Be an active listener when your close people talk about their feelings and concerns. Try to understand what people really want to say. You can use phrases like “Tell me more about what you’ve just said,” “I see that it worries you a lot,” and “I would like to hear your thoughts regarding this point.”
Dos and Don’ts of Effective Communication Post-Rehab
| Dos | Don’ts |
| Be honest and transparent | Make excuses |
| Use non-defensive communication | Defend your point of view on any price |
| Listen actively | Act like you know what your close ones are feeling |
| Stay persistent and give time to others | Expect immediate forgiveness |
| Take responsibility for your past actions | Justify yourself and rationalize substance abuse |
Accountability
Show your loved ones that you are serious-minded about changing your life for good. Tell them what you have learned in rehab, about plans that you have written into your aftercare plan when you were in rehab, and what coping mechanisms and techniques are going to be used in practice.
Join a support group, attend meetings with your therapist, invite your family members to family therapy, participate in sober activities, and take medication if prescribed. All these will show your closest people that you are constantly working to maintain long-term sobriety.
Consistent Actions
How do drugs affect relationships? Trust in your relationship was most likely broken while you were using. The only way to show that you are trustworthy and dependable again is to be consistent in your promises, actions, and persuasions.
Take small everyday actions to demonstrate it. Avoid making significant promises that you possibly wouldn’t be able to keep, like “I wouldn’t use alcohol or drugs till the end of my life.” Remember that relapses are highly possible, and they don’t mean that addiction treatment is a waste of time. Start with keeping small promises like being on time, not forgetting about birthdays or anniversaries, helping with kids, and around the house. Give your close people time to persuade them that you are really changing.
How to Rebuild Trust in a Relationship? Actions and Impacts
| Action | Positive Impact |
| Small promises keeping | Demonstrate you could be trusted again |
| Attend therapy and support meetings regularly | Shows your willingness to stay sober for a long time |
| Adhering to the recovery routine | Demonstrate your consistency in creating a new sober way of life |
| Open constructive communication | Rebuilding of emotional boundaries |
Establishing Healthy Boundaries
In a phase of active addiction, a person tends to put substance before relationships and break promises. The loss of trust creates patterns that are hard to break, so give your loved ones time and space to heal. Don’t demand to forgive you and make a part of their lives as far as you say “sorry” for the first time. Excessive persistence could destroy what is left. Simply let them know that you are committed to staying sober, but don’t push.
To minimize conflicts and stressful situations, it is useful to establish personal boundaries. These are a list of rules and limits that every person creates for himself or herself. In case of crossing these boundaries, you can speak up about it.
Healthy Boundaries in Relationships After Rehab:
- Treat others’ borders with respect and dignity, and expect the same for yours
- Discuss together the pluses and minuses of your relationships
- Say “No” if someone acts or treats you inappropriately
- Put your values before others’ thoughts about you
- Be able to express how you would like others to act or react
- Respond respectfully if others turn down your suggestion or offer
- Develop a high level of trust
Handling Triggers
This ability is important not only for maintaining sobriety but also for rebuilding trust in addiction recovery. Your loved ones may be worried that you won’t be able to cope with stressful situations without substances or couldn’t resist the chance to start using again after finishing rehab. Explain that you are aware of your addiction triggers and have learned how to deal with them. Discuss strategies you will use — avoidance, stress management, exit strategies, and asking for help.
Tell your close people about triggers and ways to handle them. Each person has his or her own set of triggers, but here are some common triggers in recovery:
- Unpleasant emotions, stress, or mental illness. Practice mindfulness, meditation, breathing techniques, and physical exercises. Take medications if prescribed.
- Pressure from other people who offer you drugs or alcohol. The best strategy is to avoid people who were involved in your past use and places where substances are appropriate.
- Boredom. Instead of experiencing pleasant feelings by using substances, create new joyful hobbies and organize your routine. It will improve your mental health.
- Bad self-care. Make sure that your nutrition and sleeping regime are well-developed because exhaustion creates a higher risk of relapse.
Celebrate Progress Together
Involve your loved ones in celebrating your recovery treatment program milestones. Such a celebration reminds you about your progress and overcoming challenges. Each smaller or bigger milestone is a cause for celebration, and it would be Brilliant if your close people shared your joy at that moment.
You can celebrate achieving your personal goals, attending events without drinking, and reaching a certain number of days, months, or years without substances. On that day, you can get all together, treat yourself, take a trip, or spend time volunteering. Any sober activity would be good; the main reason is to acknowledge your progress on the path to sobriety.
What Loved Ones Can Do for Repairing Relationships After Addiction
Your important people can also take a step forward to support you in recovery. Friends and family support is essential, and it would be great if you could work together as a team. Here are some ways to achieve that:
- Set personal boundaries together. Discuss what is acceptable and what is inappropriate in your relationships.
- Create new, healthy ways to spend time together. This will help you rebuild life after addiction, drive out destructive habits, and build emotional connections with close people.
- Model good behavior. If your family and friends really want you to stay sober for a long time, they will never offer you alcohol or drugs and will try to protect you from places where using is tolerated.
- Forgive each other. Periods of active addiction could be the darkest times in your relationship. Try to let go of your insults and concentrate on future goals and changes.
Mutual understanding and support are essential not only for a person in recovery but also for your loved ones, who are struggling too. Now they have to rebuild their lives and beliefs just like you do. Try to talk a lot, and practice one-on-one conversations where both can openly talk about their worries and concerns. In case you can’t manage constructive dialogue on your own, think about family therapy. Here a specialist helps to direct the conversation and work on underlying issues.
Stay Passionate and Persistent
Rebuilding trust is a long and challenging process that needs patience and understanding. Both sides are supposed to be ready for forgiveness, especially if a relapse is happening. However, repairing relationships in recovery is a necessary part of your recovery process, so it’s definitely worth time and effort. To find out more about ways you could establish trust in your relationships, contact a recovery expert near you.
